Something has clicked, that was waiting. In one sentence: power lateralization.

Everything I have ever wanted to do or express is engaged with power structure, impossible to evade it in any endeavor. Seduce those in power into allowing your ideas to exist, from growing up with parents selling plaster repair to rich clients to getting a college education, designing my major, extracting knowledge about black boxes, serving inside the white box, getting work into white boxes. Now I’m in the gray cylinder, deconstructing wood boxes to sell to the elite to sell to the elite, and going to Adam Broomberg’s lecture, and feeling impassioned about dismantling power structures.