8.23.15

I was on a spaceship-boat going to Jupiter. Hotel pools. Ha ha ha ha ha – boring.  A lot more but who cares – my dream symbols are interchangeable. When I awoke I was depressed. Don’t know what to do about things. Don’t know if I am cruel or tired. Think I am bored. 

In a dream I was running endlessly and thinking that I must be dreaming because I never got tired.

I want to have a job where I am dancing all day. I could dance all day, every day.

I have to be optimistic because I am. Will’s feelings are hurt. I want to have fun and be peaceful but instead everything is fraught and my fault. I quietly absorb sad, alcohol-infused hugs. We don’t talk for a while and the process begins again. 

But I can turn myself into a wave of rubber and no-1 will have hurt-feelings on my account? My account is paid in full, feelings in positive balance?  I can be a good dog and we will all die at once, suddenly, without knowing?

Try not 2 b so immature.

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