RaeRae decided to evict us due to a noise complaint. We said: “no.” We were sorry for being loud – seems like the whole block was loud. Across the street Gerald listens to classic rock until 4am.
“What do you mean? The house across the street has been vacant for 40 years.”
Text to Noah: “We should make heaps of cookies for the neighbors to apologize. We can put on our trousers and fake teeth.”
With remaining positive balance I buy the cheapest vegan chocolate chips at Smith’s.
Cut up the nice paper for neighbor-notes with a red “Le Pen:” “We are sorry for causing a noise disturbance, cookies don’t account for lost sleep but please accept our apology. It won’t happen again.”
Darcy said it was probably her noise, she had never heard us. She gives us wine and we make friends with the travelers staying at her house. Next door the neighbor says sure, she has heard our music but we’re by no means as bad as the last tenants. The man from Berlin thanks us. The next day I get a call from someone who had never noticed our volume – thanks anyway.
We hold a really loud party with our newly befriended neighbors. Gerald calls the cops.