Blood Buddies w/Mosquitos

For breakfast in Marfa I fried the crumbling remainder of our tortillas into chips topped with avocado, caramelized tomatoes/onions, and green chile.

We bought more tortillas and upon arrival in Austin made habanero pineapple guacamole, fried potatoes, beans, and brown rice for our tacos. For dinner that night we were invited to the Mass Gallery owner’s house and he made us tacos. The next day we had tacos for breakfast.

When we were camping in West Texas we made curry though, and went swimming in the river, where we saw a snake. I did pull-ups on a mysterious metal structure. We looked at constellation apps on iphones, looked at the stars, and slept under them. I used the base of my installation as a sleeping pad and didn’t sleep much due to being cold.

Around sunrise I dreamed Hoku’s dad was suggesting that I scar the skin on my face to make geometric patterns in remembrance of Hoku.

A few days prior I dreamt that a group of people were sitting in a circle. Alex mentioned that his best friend was a ghost. Alex made jokes with the space beside him and it was like old times. The space beside him felt charged and different and that was what Hoku’s ghost was.

A woman with a bike in West Texas talked to us about how everyone should be sterilized to stop the swell of overpopulation.

Our main goal in Austin was to go swimming. We went to barton springs and to the original Whole Foods. We bought expensive chia. I made cashew cream to top spaghetti with zucchini-noodles and slow-cooked/spicy marinara with fried mushrooms.

My friends saw Godzilla while Cole played songs for me and I played songs for Cole.

It rained and we went to Barton Springs again. I fixed some electronics in the backyard, which had that summer-smell of sun-warmed cat shit.

We enjoyed alcohol-infused snow-cones at Mass gallery and made noise. Cole used his big lungs to fill the gallery.


It was raining so much before the Raw Paw zine fest that I didn’t set up Proxy. I felt bored without much responsibility and walked back and forth through puddles to acquire free beer. I sat in Ice Shelf for a while, reading Aminadab and drinking Dos Equis. When I had to pee I walked to another art opening.


I talked to a tall white dude in the beer-line for a while, and talked to the tall dude’s tall friend. We’re all friends now.

Cole was looking at art, looking put out, and I asked how he felt. He was sort of sad about people making fun of this art because “it was gay,” and sort of sad that the art was good, but not quite as good as it could have been, he felt like it was a “good draft.” I told him the art in question was my favorite at the show. He said that the artist had invited his right-wing family to see it, and was nervous because of the gay-content.

The two of us sat at an outdoor table, beneath fairy lights. An enthusiastic computer-engineer student talked about Oculus Rift and near-future/sci-fi immortality. A self-proclaimed “ignorant gay boy” asked me about my gender identity. I told him I am non-binary but live in 0s and 1s.

The gay boy expounded upon gender spectrum and gender fluidity “Like you can be a boy or a girl, or in between a boy and a girl.” I got excited: “Because “boy” and “girl” are fundamental constructed opposites and with your wider model there are 3 genders, with the third being purple – or a blend of the pink and blue of currently constructed gender binary. I continued on my diatribe to position the idea of gender spectrum as an extension of gender binary, and offer a more 3d model where any point in space could be gender identity, because gender is continually constructed, can be anything, and doesn’t even have to be “gender.” WE DECIDE! WE DECIDE! GENDER IS WHATEVER! THE COUCH IS NOW LAVA! THE FLOOR IS NO LONGER LAVA! EVERYTHING IS ACTUALLY LAVA AND NOTHING IS SAFE!

The computer engineer boy got it more than the gay boy. Later the gay boy said “We taught that clueless engineer-boy so much.” I drank another beer.

As of this point, there are obvious themes in this post. A sensory constant that I have not mentioned is that in every paragraph I was acquiring new mosquito bites.

Sunscreen Dust


I Spent the last several weeks getting up at 6 or 7 and working on Stand In till 11pm or so, with food, beer, party, and going-to-work breaks in between. It went slowly. I have a real capacity to take my time.

SCUBA and I are on tour now, enjoying the luxury “no air conditioning” treatment of sitting in a metal box progressing at 55 MPH with sweat/sunscreen/dust facials.

We set up at the Tamarind Institute first, had a sleepover at the Tan gallery, and drove to Roswell the next day. Roswell is New Mexico’s dairy capital. It smells like shit.

“Why use pooping cows?” I wondered. “You non vegan assholes are the reason places smell like this.” I reminded my friends.

It was about 100 degrees in Roswell. We made salad with falafel/tahini dressing and hung out with a friendly orange cat. The person who had set up our visit at AMOCA warned us not to get our hopes up and said that the people in Roswell don’t like art. We thought that was pretty funny.


The next day we went to Marfa, which was also hot. For entertainment on the drive Sophia read us papers on critical race studies. We talked about class/culture divide as represented by places like Marfa.


I liked Marfa, probably because I like the idea of an intentionally designed art-centric community – this ideology is my white/culturally amnesic/hippy heritage. The southwestern landscape, mixed with the art movements represented in Marfa, made me feel at home.

El Cosmico put us up for the night in exchange for showing/playing there. They also offered unlimited free beer, a communal kitchen, and an outdoor bath.

Crocket and I made some noise, and Airplane Mode used my sculpture’s sounds in his electric cello set. Sophia and I went to an overpriced health food store. Chris and I made breaded and fried zucchini/mushroom sandwiches with salad. After the event was over I packed up my piece, got a nosebleed, and took a bath in the nice tub, listening to the drunken and sexist conversation of the people outside.


Thursday 5/1/14

* Outdoor Vision Fest. At work people kept saying, “You going to OVF?”

* I did go. It was loud and there were a lot of people. The pieces seemed to mostly be based on how big and loud they were, and were largely comprised of dated cultural references – a giant foam boom-box with neon graphics projection-mapped onto it, or a music video with a wolf-mask clad person playing guitar projected onto the side of a building. If it wasn’t imagery like this it was the type of abstract color and form you might see in an advertisement attempting to capitalize on youth culture, or something that highlighted female form.

* Nick and I stood around a piece (that highlighted female form) in the back which had the best music, which had been composed by Angelo rather than lifted from indie-rave circa 2010. Nick mentioned how someone looked like Hoku as they passed by. I said I had seen Hoku at this event last year . “You never know when your friends are going to die.” Nic gave me a little piece of copper.

* Nic, Angelo, and I went to Nic’s office to drink beer in the dark. That was my favorite piece. Blue light flashed through the sqaure window.

* Angelo and I had a conversation that was like “art is stupid, why make art?” Then giggled. Nic talked with his boss, we weren’t particularly supposed to be there. We hid our beers and whispered: “I hope the teacher doesn’t find us!”

* After we were freed I found Ron and Juro. We drank moonshine by the wall. Ron and I caught up on post-college happenings. We spent the rest of the night sitting in a dorm, laughing, and talking about gender.

Typical Scene

Thursday 5/8/14

When I got home the lower half of the house had fallen off and water was pouring out from the bottom. I was worried about mom.

Mom was in the leaking house, giving birth, her blood mixing with the water. “I’m giving birth and I’m dying.”

After I got home from work I made salad and changed my shirt. Noah said: “whoa.” I came out of my room and he told me that he’d seen mom come home and go into the living room. He followed her, then realized she wasn’t there. He said the footsteps he heard were probably me. I told him about this morning’s dream.

Noah repeated: “I’m just gonna keep describing this quesadilla I’m making until M comes up from The Bass” Mom came home. “Hi mom I just saw your ghost.”

When I came up from The Bass they told me what happened and I guffawed and danced around. “You’re easily amused” said mom.

I spent the rest of the evening gluing pieces of hail together as mom made Moroccan stew. When I came inside she was on the couch drinking wine and the kitty was on the table drinking water. “This is such a typical scene” I thought. I took a blurry picture.


Rain on the Skylight

Saturday 4/26/14

* Feathericci album release. A lot of people dressed like rabbits and deer. Forest shadow decorations. The techno was wanna-be Pantha du Prince realness. Yeah, the only genre I really like is #boringtechno.

* I finished my $8 lemonade (expecting the usual $6 margarita, but for bigger crowds they raise the prices and lower the alcohol content).

* Niomi and I left as our friends arrived.

* I gave Eugene, my new homeless friend, a ride all over town for a little under an hour. He was looking for people to help him out with a place to stay. Every time he would exit the car he would say: “Don’t leave me!” Eventually we found him a place, he relaxed and we talked about music.

* Arrived at the after party and plopped myself into conversation.
* After some hours of floating and chatting, dancing, and fooling myself into thinking I would leave soon, the sun came up.


Sunday 4/27/14


* Benji and I galloped away from the party into the sunrise. I drove Benji home and John drove Emily home. It was a good joke. Everyone high-fived goodbye.
* John asked if I wanted to come over and listen to music. I said I didn’t know if I wanted to go to sleep or to go jogging.
* Nice to sit there, sleep deprived, talking about all the nice stuff people get to talk about. The music was good. The sound of the heater coming on was well-placed with songs.
* Outside we stood on logs. One of the logs had a dime on it. It had been there for a while. John had thrown the dime or something and it landed on the log. Two dogs came by and I mentioned a series of dreams I had that featured two dogs. John’s eyes were clear and blue behind his nice glasses and the air was moist.
* At around 10 am John and I laid on the floor and slumber-party-slur-talked about art. Rain pattered on the skylight.
* As I dozed my seratonin gut was neon pink – the feeling that was hidden inside the solid white-water bubble. Our bodies were magnified electricity.
* Woke up at 12:30, went to my car to get my toothbrush, brushed my teeth, and drove in the well-lit hail.
* Instead of leaving John a birthday card or a fruit basket I sent him a text.
* “What a beautiful day” I said to Bill as I walked in the door. “I made vegan apple crumble” said Bill. “What a beautiful day.”
* When I got home everyone in the house played Hide and Go Seek.

I keep my Knife Sharp

Sunday 4/20/14

* Woke up and mom was already making the burritos I was making.
* Most likely due to that, we were on time to pick up Andrew and Jamie and drive to Denver.
* Drove to Denver.
* Jamie asked at the hotel about good beer nearby, and the concierge gave us eight coupons for free beers.
* Drank a free beer at a cheesy place near the hotel. Actually it was barley wine. It was a little one-note for craft barley wine, but very good for free craft barley wine.
* Andrew looked for sushi on his iPhone while I looked for vegan restaurants on my iPhone.
* Noah and I walked for a half hour to a vegan restaurant that ended up being closed. We saw a lot of people with dumb graphic t shirts and shorts. We started playing a game where if we saw anyone who looked like we would want to hang out with them we would earn a point.
* We shopped at Safeway, getting apples, carrots, oranges “hot” salsa, sweet potato chips, and tall cans of IPA. The IPA was weak -sort of like licking receipt paper.
* We sat on some concrete blocks. I drank some of the “hot” salsa, which was more like a cold soup. The chips were almost as good as they were overpriced.
* Back at the hotel we found an all-night pizza place that had vegan cheese.
* We talked to a few homeless people while waiting for our pizza.
* On the hotel TV we watched a show about 3d printing organs to live forever or something. Also uploading consciousness to computer and Oculus Rift stuff. It was interesting, but not very in depth seeing as it was a shitty TV show.
* Put some essential oils in my nose and went to sleep.

Monday 4/21/14

* Angelo was saying something to me in a white room. I don’t remember what we were talking about. I invariably have vivid dreams featuring the color white when I use my “sweet dreams” essential oils.
* Woke up at 8:30 to Andrew and Jamie leaving to get a complimentary breakfast at a different hotel. They invited me and I would have gone except for that there’s nothing I hate more than getting up too early or continental breakfast.
* Got up and was startled by bright light of bathroom as compared with dark room.
* Drank magnesium-tap water and thought about my big dumb project, ordering some spray glue and velcro.
* Andrew and Jamie came back and left again.
* Noah and I walked to museum, museum was closed, walked to vegan food truck, vegan food truck did not exist.
* Noah wanted to go into a vase store. We went into the vase store and Noah liked it.
* Found an Indian restaurant, ate there, it was good.
* Bought water and lip balm from a woman with abstract nails.
* Hotel room, Adventure Time, looked for a coffee shop that had “almond milk” in reviews.
* At a coffee shop with house-made almond milk, minimal design, white marble, glass, metal, naturally shaped polished wood table tops. Best latte I’ve ever had. Writing about it now. Jazz is playing.


* Walked to a liquor store that said: “Sewage smell exist, if u can’t handle don’t come in.” Bought some tequila and hid it in the tequila pocket of my backpack.
* Waited in line for The Knife, eating an apple and drinking tequila until I had to pee.
* Jamie and Andrew arrived. I gave them some of the raw almond crackers I had in my backpack, Jamie said they tasted just like spicy Cheese Its. (By the way I am Tao Lin circa Shoplifting from American Apparel right now).
* Went to a liquor store to pee.

* “stop peeing you bastard man.  it move” Noah texted me.
* I leapt into the venue, so excited that my feet didn’t touch the ground.

* Noah and I waited outside the tour vans and chatted with a guard. “The Knife’s biggest fan”  who was wearing a Dinosaur Jr. shirt, came and joined us, and talked baout how he was The Knife’s biggest fan. I told him I was The Knife’s biggest fan and that I would kill him.

* Jamie and Andrew came out with their plastic parrot and we all wrote Knife references on it “If I was a bird” “Comb your hair with my peak” etc. Noah drew two dicks, two holes, and three pouches, or something like that, in reference to a poem one of The Knife had recited, and wrote “Armadillo” across its wings. Later we gave our (stepped on, goofy) fan-art to some of the people who were on the road with The Knife, and talked to a few of the members. Apparently they had been getting trashed at Marble Brewery in Albuquerque on Sunday, and we sorely regretted not being there to invade their privacy.


Cherry Pie, Sushi, Sushi, Tour

4.13.14 Sunday

* Covered for Jessica at SITE. Cherry pie.
* Biked home in slight rain and some wind, singing.
* Rode to Keiko’s with mom, listening to Cryin’ Cole and the Miserable Cowboys.
* Grandpa Obie played songs in garage.
* Sushi, beer, more beer (dad was there) sake.
* Text message inviting me to another sushi party.
* Got plum wine, brought Noah stuff.
* Hung out with Crocket, Sandra, Emily, Benji, Matt and Caity, made sushi, drank plum wine, drank sake, Chris Brodsky came, drank sake.
* Crocket and Sandra invited me on tour. I said “okay.”
* Wrote bio for SITE show for both Benji and I. “Your art is about corporate girl power right Benji?”

* Watched Game of Thrones with everyone. Game of Thrones is a TV show about 1980’s Europe, but some parts take place in LA where there are decadent parties sponsored by Cheetos. There was a lot of cleavage.
* Watched old TV guide menus on youtube, and Champagne taste.

Identical Lines

4.12.14 Saturday

* Biked to work.
* Made subversive (vegan) mock-tuna sandwich for “Identical Lunch” by Allison Knowles (which I hate, and I will write a post about how much I hate it, and I will get paid to hate that piece as part of SITE’s new social media efforts, and that will be funny, so then I won’t have to hate the piece as much).
* Went to plaid show, was bored, went home.
* Worked on gender set, drank beer, and ate potato salad.
* Picked up Noah and The Fellas.
* Ran around the central-wall in circles with Noah until mom came home.


Mine and SCUBA’s pieces at Plaid Show.

Let’s Tear Our Bodies Apart!

4.11.14 Friday

* At work, a lot of pain, vision blurring, nearly passing out.
* Took 4 extra strength ibuprofin after 2 didn’t work. There was a meeting in the conference room during my break so I napped under the fax machine. It was funny.
* Then I was very high from the painkillers. I said so as we ate salad and everyone felt awkward but me – due to the pain killers.
* Selling art for SITE Unseen.
* Met Benji’s mom at Armory show.
* Saw Iris at Armory show.

* Also saw all my other friends who are the best art themselves, but also make it.

* Went home, talked to mom, ate fried rice that she made.

* Mom once took many painkillers while working at a yogurt shop and said “Wouldem youem likem somem topingem?” While listening to “falling in Love Again” by Marlene Dietrich.
* It was Wendy’s birthday so mom had bought monk-beer to share with Aaron for a toast. (Wendy was my mom’s friend who committed suicide, and Aaron is her widower).
* Took one of the monk-beer’s to Matt and Caity’s.
* Matt made bananas foster.
* Benji fed me RUM.
* I became amply flushed and talked about how weird pain and humanity are.
* Emily, Benji and I chatted in the parking lot. I felt like things were different. I felt spacious – cracked open. I said: “Let’s tear our fucking bodies apart, let’s tear our fucking lives apart, let’s have some fun!”

The Best Blood Orange

4.9.14 Wednesday

* Email from DMaX developer.
* Still couldn’t get DMaX working.
* Spent the rest of the morning on music.
* Rode bike to Post Office/Office Depot (for a paint pen)/ Sprouts (for two big beers) and to work, which was mostly listening to music and eating snacks.

* Google Maps Street View car followed me for a few blocks near Acquia Madre and Paseo de Peralta.
* The exercise at the work meeting was to listen to songs that we like or are meaningful, and then say our name and what we liked about the song. I chose We Share Our Mother’s health by The Knife and discussed the pleasing bounce and stretch of the texture, and the lyrics about colonization, and my perceived Mapplethorpe references in the music video.
* The funniest was Tim saying that the Cyndi Lauper song he chose wasn’t his favorite song, and wasn’t even his favorite Cyndi Lauper song, but that it would do. Then we all practiced Visual Thinking Strategies.
* A facilitator workshop guy was observing Joanne facilitating us facilitating.
* Rode bike home, tried on new blazer, drank a beer, texted John and worked on gender set.
* Ate a burrito.

* Drove Noah and River to Backroad and gave them the last $5 from my last DJ set at Molly’s that David L. gave me.
* Hung out with John by the trampoline and talked about how cute our staff meeting was, art, and how bad our theses were. I think I should submit to this website about it.
* Picked Noah and River up and saw Reed and Dad.
* Tatsuya Nakatani at high Mayhem. The opening band were hilarious. It was the type of experimental music that is the genre experimental rather than the process. The two spun “Wind Wands” and occasionally rang bells, all while looking at each other with the cutest smiles. One guy had a psuedo-mullet and I think we were in piano class together at community college, if I’m correct he’s the one who’s mbira I tuned. The other guy sort of looked like this guy:
when he lifted the “Wind Wand” over his head his pot belly poked through. Noah texted me: “These dads are having so much fun with their science toy magic” and I replied “Oh no, I shouldn’t be driving this car.” We both worked hard stifle our laughter for the rest of their set.
* As John and I sat outside we were joined by two friendly bros, one of whom had a puma shirt and one of whom had a fake John Deere logo with a donkey silhouette that said “Juan Deer.” They asked us our names and later apologized for forgetting them a few minutes later. I said “it’s okay we’re dreaming.” Puma said “Oh, are we gonna go deep? We are always having deep conversations about how life is really a dream.” I said “I take it back, we are awake.” Juan Deere asked what we were about and I stood up, waving my arms and said “I’m M Wingren and I’m great!” Then I asked them if they caught the reference to one of my own dreams.
* Tatsuya Nakatani was excellent. Actual experimental music. Noah had gone up to him to get a picture and said he really liked his music. Nakatani said “why?”
* After the show, room and room inhabitants transformed by the music, I bought a CD and gave Tatsuya Nakatani the best blood orange.
* Went into John’s house for a tiny taste of the vodka I left there (John apologized for not getting captain crunch for Noah) and to make great jokes.
* Drove River to get stuff from her house.
* Ate snacks and went to bed.
* There was a great percussive sound outside and Noah came excitedly into my room and asked if I heard it. He thought it might be Cole with a coconut, and I thought it might be Sean with a bucket. We went outside in robes with a baseball bat and didn’t find any great drummers.